Archive for the ‘Kumar Sangakara’ Category
How SL would make it to the final
How’z it going to be an All Asian final this Saturday ?
India or Pakistan shall play cricket and the winner will go through to the final.
And SL : “we keep our heads down and make sure we cover all the bases we have to cover”.
Thats how Lankans would cross over to make it to the finals. When and if they win the semis in Colombo, their captain shall again cry, “why do we need to cover our final base in Mumbai? As co-host we should cover our final base in our home base to lay the base for upcoming slingers, cheaters and non-walkers”
Statements, statements and more statements.
Rosco on fire in Pallekele….
In walked Ross Taylor, on his 27th birthday, and he received two generous gifts from Pakistan. Before he had scored, Taylor edged the second ball of Shoaib’s second spell. Akmal moved to towards his right to take a catch that was his for the taking, and then stopped and looked expectantly at first slip, where Younis Khan looked on in shock as the ball sped to the third-man boundary. A ball later Taylor edged again, this time the easiest of chances straight to Akmal, who dropped it again.
How are Pakistani selectors, coach and captain persisting with this lunatic dickhead is beyond logical comprehension. He uttered “Shahid Bhai” 15 times in Afridi’s last over and what his reprieve costed Pakistan in last 6 overs is mind blowing.
Excellent hitting Rosco. That would shit hell scare the next opponent captain reluctant to play in Mumbai.
SL vs India — something Lankan fans dont want
I had always believed SL fans are the most rowdiest on the globe and the following link just proves how much they are obsessed about India. They are hell scared what shall happen if their team plays India in India.
Not only on the above links, the fans have posted some cheap stuff on the Indian players but also commented lot of shit stuff on “sexuality”. Filthy stuff.
Since 2007, whenever I peek a boo in Lankan forums, all I find is blind hatred and filthy comments on anything Indian. And it gives me a confirmation to believe that they are the most arrogant and unsporty fans in the cricket world.
Dig in more forums on this site and you shall unearth more hatred and unparliamentary stuff on Indian cricket.
Never knew that Lankans would be so wary of the Indian juggernaut in their psyche so much so that they would openly confess how much they fear the Indian batting. Not to forget the infamous Randi no-ball episode directed, produced and scripted by Sir Kumar Sangakara.
Sangakara is afraid to play in Mumbai
We were surprised when we learned that we will have to travel to Mumbai to play that game. I thought hosts play at home,” he said. “Playing the New Zealand game is beyond our control. You can’t change that now. That’s gone now and we need to be up for the task.”
The man is hell scared to play in India, especially in Mumbai cos its here in this city his team was streamrolled by Sehwag in 2009 Test series.
But how come he didnt know the itinerary before hand the tourney began? Is he scared to play in India? Well of course, he wont have the slow, low turners on the Wankhede track and of course he wont have Russell Arnold singing constant praise of every Sri Lankan player in the team.
Listening to Russell Arnold is even worse than listening to the trio of Athers, Hussein and Beefy or Arun Lal, Sivramkrishnan etc.
Just a FYI to captain articulate, India is also one of the host countries of this world cup and they played their first game in Mirpur, BD. We didnt hear any such weird comments from Mahendra Singh Dhoni.
They were lucky to have escaped with a no result against Australia. They now play against Zimbabwe who would be crushed and then they play against New Zealand in Mumbai when they would be crushed.
Lankans have rode all the luck in the previous world cups to have been called the most consistent team in the world cups post 1996. They got 2 forfeits and one default in 1996 and then they won the tournament. Ditto here. 3 easy wins against Canada, Kenya and Zimbabwe. Defeat against Pakistan, no result against Australia and a possible defeat against NZ in Mumbai is making Sangakara make such weird statements.
THooo
Pakistan vs Sri Lanka
On a day of glorious batsmanship from Sachin Tendulkar and unexpectedly Andrew Strauss, I chose to write on the tie between Pakistan and Sri Lanka that took place on the Saturday. It was a tie SL was expected to win hands up, instead they lost hands down.
The 2 old lads of Pak cricket — Younus and Misbah led the team to a total of 277 followed by some good bowling by Shoaib Akhtar and Shahid Afridi. The Lankans fell short by 11 runs and in the end its heard that a panic has been setup in their camp.
Sangakara as usual made 49 without going on to win a game for his country. Jayawardhena after all praising and writing made just 2 and got his stumped ripped off an Akhtar beauty. Chamara Silva, Kulasekra and Angelo Matthews tried in the end but it was too late and SL tasted their first home world cup defeat. Huh? Whom they had played before in the home games? 1996 ? Serious teams refused to tour them in 1996 and then they played Zimbabwe and Kenya at home and now Canada and Pakistan.
Period.
As I said before as all the high talk this lads do is good for the weak and hapless teams. When the stronger teams come, this lads just freeze up and lose.
And thats why this team wont win the world cup.
Lanka ki hawa tight
Blabberings vanished in the thin air, the 100 maker is comprehensively bowled, the Test batsman is out stumped to Pathan and now only the Sanga Nanga remains on the crease.
0/75 to 4/93.
Stuff champions are made of? Mahela’s ass. Get off. If you talk big, show it on the field else shut your freaking mouth shut.
Alle Alle. Wickets fall alle alle.
Russell Arnold is quiet now after boring us of how good every one in Lankan team is. Where is he now?
Best Middle Order Effort reads 11,21,2, 18 and 7
There was a headline in the Cricinfo feed that Mahela Jayawardhene praised the middle order for their effort.
A look at the middle order performance and leaving out his 100 and captain’s 92, the other efforts read 11,21,2, 18 and 7 (last 2 being not out). By what standards are this numbers praiseworthy? What did MJ smoke before writing that article or blabbering again in the media?
Have Lankans decided that they are always going to say good things, show great attitude in the field even when the middle order fails, the mystery bowler fails to take wickets for the top order? Are they always going to say politically correct things in the public thus fooling themselves?
We’ve never heard any real feedback from the MJs and Sangas in the media about the problems / issues facing their team. They are always following well laid processes, are as good as they can and you can add as many jargons / words / phrases as you wish, but still Lankans are not the world beaters in any format. They have failed to win a Test match after Murali retired, yet they are …….
That thing called Virender Sehwag
Virender Sehwag, the bloody Indian opening batsman. Bloody buffoon. Kickass opener. What else should I say about this Delhi Jat. No brains, just brutal power. No messing up. Simple style of play. Bad ball, he would hit it. Doesnt matter who the hell is the bowler. Shakib or Rubell or Bow Wow, Randibaaj Suraj or even the Chuck himself. Ask any bowler around the world. Better ask Pakistanis. Lankans call him Shewag.
He has demolished them too. The merchants of pace, swing and reverse swing. Of course spot fixed no balls too. He deposited even Wasim Akram and Waqar Younis in stands on that glorious Centurion evening 8 years and 2 world cups back.
Ask Sangakara who is so scared of this idiot Indian batsmen that he asks Randibaaj Suraj to bowl no balls. He might seem poor man’s Amir or Asif which occured well before spot fixing saga. If he did not score a 100 on that game day, he yet demonized Sangakara and other Lankans. They swear in private they wont take on Indian ODI or test team which has Sehwag in it. Either he would make a 294 in a Test against them or he would make a 146 in a ODI. No respite. No swearing has its effect. The man lives by his own rules, his own standards. Now the bufoon is saying he would bat 50 overs. Like I said before what would happen if he bats 50 overs, the Deshis had a bitter taste of it yesterday in Mirpur.
There are so many wannabe Sehwags around. There is Dilshan in Lanka who emulates Sehwag but runs out of steam around 50-80 mark. Then there is Tamim Iqbal who steps more often than not yet fails to emulate the man. Then there is Shane Watson who is doing a Sehwag for Prick Tonping.
There can be many emulators, but there is one and only Sehwag. Rattle him with short stuff, he wont play pull. Bowl him in his ribs, he would counter it. Sledge him he would deposit you into stands or even throw you out of the stadium, be it Mirpur or Hamba ka tota or his own backyard of Kotla. Rajkot too.
Dilip Vengsarkar is now proved an idiot and to an extent MSD too, who had dropped this idiot from the CB series finals in favor of Sir Rohit Sharma. When Sehwag bats the way he does most of the times, the opposition reduces to the local club side. There are many who try to be “shahahne” like Ponting or Sangakara, but they are soon proved assholes by the man who knows no stopping when in full flow. That is Virender Sehwag for you. Unique and unparalleled.
A night in Lankan camp before their game against Canada
When Sangakara and Mahela Jayawardhena, the Indie commando were retiring to the team rooms to go to their respective wives, a night before the world cup kick started and they had ranted enough to put the remainder of Lankan team to sleep in the confrence room itself, they saw a fat man barging the hotel in deep anger.
Alongside the fat man the blabba kings saw a familiar figure step in but in an apologetic mode.
The fat man came to Sangakara and Jayawardhena and said “You fools, you are good for nothing idiots. You let the bloody Indians take away the record for highest world cup total in 2007. BD and you guys kicked India’s ass out, but they kicked my team’s ass out of the record we had for the highest score in a world cup game. I bloody dont care if you send off Murali on a high note or not, dont care if you, the talkative bufoon joins me in the world cup winning captain group of this Ravana country. All I want is the record back. Beat the 413 record and get it on the name of Ravana country.”
The familiar man was in tears and nostalgic mood. He said “I remember Saar making 145 runs in that game in Kandy vs Kenya and we made 398 runs and that stood until that Prick’s Australia made 438.” And he bursts into tears.
Sanga and Mahela are still stunned.
The fat man continues ” You mofos, I installed pride in Lankan krikat by going for all sorts of records thus killing the spirit of krikat. I told my boys to make records and have all records on their names. Beat minnows big, continue batting for 3 days, 4 days and let wins go to hell, but Sri Lankan krikat should hold all records. See we have 576, 952, 624, 374, 287 and we had 398. We also have 443. But we dont have highest record for a world cup match. Make it you fools or else I would ask President to put you in jail like he did to the army chief Fonseka.”
Sanga felt motivated and his character tonic felt an unimaginable rush.
Fat man and the apologetic man left and Jayawardhena was motivated. Sanga called up the entire team and started ranting about the records and Mahela said “Yes we are the Ravana country. Like he had record for 10 heads, we would have records for all batting and bowling. I would rant it in cricinfo, Sanga you rant in the match conf”.
Suddenly Thilana Samaraweera got up and said “Sanga saar, I am the king of batting long, long and making double hundreds. Dont worry saar, I would bat long as i can and block the balls. I would put the opposite captain to sleep and yawn. I would make 200 runs and I would bat 3 days in row in the World Cup”.
Sangakara got and hugged Samaraweera. He went up and called fat man. “Saar, can you ask ICC to mend the records of ODI krikat to ensure that Sri Lankan batsmen can bat for 3 days in row. And then we shall reclaim all our records. Please do it as you did it for Murali to tweak the 15 degree rule to allow him to throw balls, err…bowl his regular stuff”.
Fat man agreed and called up Sharad Pawar, the ICC chief who tried to speak to him in Bangla, but fat man knew just Englis and Sinhala. With help of a translator fat man explained Pawar his intention, but Pawar rebuked him and reminded that “this is one day cricket which is over in 6.5 hours”.
Fat man was angry but he could not do anything. Later he called back Sangakara and said “Ask Thilana Samaraweera to bat long in Tests, not in ODIs. Have somebody make 300 and ensure team crosses 500 in 40 over mark and then declare the innings.”
Sangakara and Mahela nodded and decided to toe the fat man’s order.
Character Rant to kick off!!!
Minnow marauders Lankans have shown their intentions to gobble up the minnows mercilessly by thumping Holland by 156 runs in their first warm up game. So much for their win that their 2 best men in character rant, best men in defining how good Sri Lanka and the youthful team is, didnt need to bat.
They shall murder Kenya, Canada big time in the league games and if they do the same to the strong teams — Australia, Pakistan and Kiwis would be a question. SL are no longer invincible in their home turf, last few years have shown this to the world. Plus every team that travels to the subcontinent comes with the staple dose of spinners. So if Lanka would be able to maul strong team would be a keen thing to watch.
I am waiting for the talking bufoons in Sanga and Jayawardhena to kick start their rants!!!
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